Have you noticed that negative memories are often the most vivid ones? I struggle to recall moments of joy, but I can tell you exactly where I was, what was said, and how I felt years ago when a restaurant manager was cruel to my daughter.

How can we stop bitterness from taking root? We forgive. To forgive means that you will never ask the other person to pay you what is owed. That debt might be something tangible, but it also includes emotional pain and loss.

The thought of such radical forgiveness is breathtaking. To forgive like this, we must understand we are like the first servant in the Matthew 18 parable. I tend to minimize my sin, but Jesus says my sin is grievous because it is committed against the perfectly holy God. He willingly paid the great debt I owed by dying in my place. In comparison, every sin committed against me, significant though it may be, is smaller. That’s our reality.

The key to forgiveness is that if you want to be able to forgive others, you must grasp the mercy you have been shown in Christ.